The most difficult truth for me to accept at any given moment is that what is happening in my reality is a projection of my inner self. The concept that the seemingly random situations and circumstances which show up in my life are anything but random is a theory I learned decades ago, but fully accepting it and applying it has been a journey.
How high or how pure my vibration is on any given day is increasingly being reflected back to me in shorter and shorter periods of time. In fact, the time delay has grown so short, life experiences don’t seem random any longer.
Two weeks ago, I visited some friends I hadn’t seen in over 25 years. Before I even left, I knew I was going to crash my vibration by drinking on the trip. I have no illusions any longer that when I choose to drink alcohol that it lowers my vibration. I also ate a lot of junk food on the trip which pulled me down a bit further. While the visit went well, as we mostly told old stories and laughed…which pulls up vibration, it all came home to roost when I went to the airport.
I got to the airport fairly early and almost immediately, the airline started delaying the flight. They delayed it about four times right up until midnight and then canceled it. I watched the people around me get angry and complain loudly.
I smiled to myself and thought, “Well, this is the OPPOSITE of the flow I normally experience.”
I called a hotel and they were supposed to send a shuttle. It never came. I took a cab to the hotel and they wouldn’t honor the rate it showed online, but allowed me to book online while I sat in their lobby. The first room they sent me to had someone else in it. The second room’s keys didn’t work and had to go back down. When I a key that worked, I found out quickly that the room had a smoke detector chirping every few seconds. They upgraded me to a suite and I pretty much just fell into bed at 2 a.m.
The front desk attendant was apologetic throughout and said she couldn’t believe how calm I was given all the problems. I knew what was happening wasn’t her fault and the only thing I could do at this point was to choose how I was to react to it. I could choose to be a jerk or I could choose to own everything that was showing up in my reality as my co-creation.
I lived for most of my life in the “blame, shame, victim game” where I thought that the behavior of others and/or the circumstances of my life is the reason my reality was the way it was. Even after I was made aware of how reality works, I chose to deny it because then I would have to own all of it. I had felt rejected, excluded and much like an outcast for much of my life, at least until my 30s and 40s when I started to learn these concepts and begin to peel away the outer layers of my wounded psyche.
Owning my reality also meant that what had occurred to me over the course of my life wasn’t anyone’s fault. My personal experience wasn’t a result of the behavior of my parents, caretakers, friends, teachers or even my enemies. It was simply the reflection of my inner reality.
Another basic premise I had to relearn and accept was that I didn’t come into this world as a blank slate. My soul incarnated with a spiritual agenda through which I would have the opportunity to awaken and own my innate, Divine power. I accepted that I chose the souls who would be a part of my journey in this lifetime, including my parents. I chose all of it to perfectly align with my own agenda to give me emotional anchor points. These anchor points could either serve as an opportunity to heal the wounded parts of my soul if I chose a conscious and positive path…or a way to blame others for what I felt if I chose a negative and unconscious path.
As I peeled away the layers of my repressed emotional pain by either facing it directly, releasing large portions through spiritual forgiveness exercises or transmuting it through meditation, I became more and more in tune with my inner Self.
By this point, I could not deny that I could no longer feel the impacts of foods, drinks, entertainment or other energetic experiences even before I experienced them. If I knew something wasn’t going to benefit me and I did it anyway…and I experienced a consequence from that, then I couldn’t very well hold anyone else responsible for my choice, could I?
As a consciously awakened being, more often than not, I am aware of how I feel at any given moment and know what kind of signal I’m sending out to create my future moment. Do I still have unconscious moments?
Absolutely.
I have these especially when I’m not meditating on a regular basis and for me, those moments show up in traffic.
When I am meditating, exercising, spending time outside in the sun and eating high-life-force foods, my life flows.
The difference is that I can’t go back to living unconsciously and be in any form of denial when my life starts to get chaotic. I may not admit it to others, but I know when and why it happens.
If you are awakening, I suspect you know it as well, even if you don’t hear that message inside of you as clearly as I hear mine. You know.
When you tell or even think that others that are responsible for why you feel what you feel, you are giving your power away.
When we choose to own our power, it can seem daunting because we have been living unconscious our whole lives. However, just like learning any other new skill, you work on as much as you can at a time. You rest when you need to because your body can only release portions of this old energy.
Yet each time you release the old energy of what you are not, you automatically awaken to a little more of who you are. And one day, you’ll look in the mirror and it will hit you!
You will realize how powerful you are!
You will realize that it was only your own fear of growth, change and having to face your old pain that held you back for so long. And you realize that help in facing it was always there and now you can face anything!
And THIS is the Revelation of Self. You have revealed the true nature of your Self…your Divine Self to the mind and in doing so, you free yourself from the prison of the illusion.
Now the next question is, what will you do now?
Namaste
Jeff
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Jeff Scholl is a Certified Spiritual Life Coach through Holistic Learning Centers and a Board-Certified Holistic Health Practitioner through the American Association of Drugless Practitioners.
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